30 second long jokes. Sometimes, these jokes get boring and we tend to lose interest. A thief stuck a pistol in the man’s ribs and said: “Give me your money. Long Jokes. Washington knocks on the door and the farmer answers. #15 How many marketers does it Aug 8, 2022 · Because bears can be mean, but frogs are always cool. Axentevlad / Getty Images. Three mice are being chased by a cat. A man walks into a magic forest and tries to cut down a talking tree. Download unlimited music for video with TunePocket royalty free music subscription and use as background soundtracks in personal and The Shape of Water (Film) Zelda: Made Brewster pigs in a blanket tonight before leavin’. Later when the mice told their mother what happened, she smiled and said, "You see, it pays to be bilingual!" Submitted by Jeanne Ramirez. I will grant you a wish. In the morning, I shall be sober. Why shouldn't you play games with big cats? Because sometimes they're cheetahs. " Rather old, and I've seen it posted on reddit before, but this is a great long-form joke. Whether you're sharing a laugh at a family gathering or just brightening your day, these tales won't disappoint. Suddenly a genie appeared and said - you have made me free. One Of The Best Long Jokes For Adults. Don’t put your thumb in, you’ll break it. The thief replied: “In that case, give me my money. He’s knocking you out ‘cause no guy’s going to take that from an ugly chick. He gives the kid a dime and the kid hands him a cup. What is brown, hairy and wears sunglasses? A coconut on vacation. Carlin, Burr, Pryor, etc. Time is a fascinating concept that governs our lives, yet it can also be a source of humor and amusement. " When she asked what in the world I was talking about, I pointed out, "This is your thirty-second birthday. Day 60: Built a sandcastle. What is the best breakfast cereal to eat in the winter? Sep 20, 2023 · During a party, a lady goes up to Winston Churchill and says, “Sir, you’re drunk. So, buckle up for some wholesome humor and get ready to laugh out loud! Aug 6, 2019 · Funny Ha-Ha? The Funniest Jokes With Long Set Ups That Are Totally Worth the Wait. Our bite-sized videos, with engaging narration and subtitles, will keep you entertained in just 30 seconds. What food do you get when you cross Frosty with a polar bear? – A “brrr” – “grrr”. 429 Dad Jokes to Keep Your Family Groaning in Second-Hand Embarrassment. You can also encourage your students to come up with their own school-friendly jokes that they think are funny. By Sarah Crow Carrie Weisman. Six days ago he uploaded 100×30 , a record of 100 songs each a hair over 30 seconds long, to SoundCloud. The father of the bride gave a tearful speech, saying, ‘I’m not losing a daughter, I’m gaining a son-in-law. A duck is standing next to a busy road, cars zooming past while he waits for a break in traffic. Let me cup your boob uncomfortably while I show you this. One day, he heard a strange sound coming from the top of the hill. She says to a man next to her: “The driver just insulted me!”. What did one math book say to the other? Aug 7, 2023 · Prepare for laughter overload! Discover the funniest marriage jokes that capture the joy, quirks, and humor of wedded bliss. Become instantly popular at work and when soc Mar 21, 2024 · 109 Actually Funny Clean Jokes for Any Situation. He asked her for Read "World's Best 30 Second Jokes A huge collection of jokes for your Kobo" by Marcus Lindley available from Rakuten Kobo. Get ready to dive into a collection of lightning-fast jokes all centered around the Nov 28, 2023 · If you need a long joke to brighten up the mood, check out this article with loads of funny story jokes on various topics. If you’re ugly — boom. " May 3, 2024 · The magic of longer jokes. MONOLOGUE Ah! Misery! Mother has gone, gone to Text. The big man sees the little Irishman staring at him; he looks down and says: ‘7 feet tall, 350 pounds, 20-inch penis, 3 pounds of testicles, Turner Brown. If you like the jokes, go ahead and share them on your favorite social media platform. She seemed surprised. 3K voters. Oct 25, 2023 · 150 Time Jokes. After a week, he starts to keep a diary: Day 1: Alone, did some swimming. Second graders are at an exciting age where they are curious and absorbent and seem to know more than you about a lot of things, like current trends, the latest trading cards, and video games. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named “Ahmal. Jan 24, 2022 · Watch W2S funniest moments here!!!Like and subscribe. Hot af, overpriced and all over me within 30 seconds of getting in the car. Dec 3, 2014 · In the whirlwind of outrage around Bill Cosby, many people have asked why, given how long ago the first rape allegations against him became public, no one called him out sooner. 6. Easter is a Christian holiday which coincides with the Jewish Passover. " A list of 9 32nd Birthday puns! These are 47 second chance jokes and hilarious second chance puns to laugh out loud. m. March 21, 2024. He told me not to think of him as the boss, rather, think of him as a friend who is never wrong. I'm on a seafood diet. The man says: “You go up there and tell him off. “It’s not a gong,” the drunk replies. 3. Churchill replies, “Madam, you are ugly. Dec 20, 2023 · The Best Funny School-Appropriate Jokes for Your Class. Looking for clean jokes, appropriate for just about any setting or audience? Here's a collection of more than 100 jokes to chose from. A drunk guy is showing his friend his new apartment. I know you've come here to read jokes about turning 30, but turning 30 is a joke in itself. Mar 22, 2023 · At the wedding, the best man gave a toast, saying, ‘I’ve never seen the groom happier than he is now. George Washington and his men are looking for a place to stay one night after a long fight against the British After marching through the woods for some hours, they find a farm. Antibiotics and insulin aside, laughter is the best medicine. These pun-filled gems never fail to bring a 10. However, if the set up and delivery of Introduction. Because business was light. Go on, I’ll hold your monkey for you. , adding 5 hours would make it 2 p. These jokes celebrate the joys and challenges of entering a new decade in a light-hearted way. The woman couldn’t stand the curiosity. Never has there been a frog hopping toward me, and I thought ‘Man, I'd better play dead. Jun 6, 2014 · 2. " "Nooooo," said St. Oct 21, 2020 · Icebreaker jokes like that ne copy attention. If you’re in the mood for some long-form humor that’s worth the wait, we’ve compiled a collection of hilarious long funny jokes guaranteed to tickle your funny bone and keep you laughing for days. However, while many of us have repertoires chock-full of raunchy jokes perfect for cracking up our Jun 2, 2022 · A man says to his wife, “All you do is moan. And a few extra gray hairs. If your ear itches, it usually means someone’s been talking about you, and you might be a well known fucker. Lady Mary Lasenby. When he arrives at the first house, the whole family comes out, congratulates him, and sends him on his way with a $50 gift envelope. Suddenly a tiny man comes out of the man's shirt pocket, sits down on the bar and drinks his beer from the thimble. Jan 12, 2024 · 30. The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. Jun 7, 2022 · Celebrating birthdays takes planning and perusing unless you use all my resources here at Skip to My Lou! In short, take a look at these ideas and HAVE FUN! Hilarious jokes – be the life of the party! I would love to keep you fully stocked with creative ideas, yummy recipes, fun crafts, and loads of free printables. Curious, he walks up the hill and knocks on the giant doors at the front of the temple. Hands down. The waiter finds his request strange, but he complies. 🤔. . A chicken walks up to Read "World's Best 30 Second Jokes A huge collection of jokes for your Kobo" by Marcus Lindley available from Rakuten Kobo. The last stop is the bedroom, where a big brass gong sits next to the bed. Q: I add 5 to 9 and get 2. I said to the Gym instructor “Can you teach Oct 31, 2022 · Q: If 2 is company and 3 is a crowd, what are 4 and 5? A: 9. You can vote, share, and learn the secrets behind telling a long joke with ease and hilarity. A boy and a man sit on a couch together. At the second house, they present him with a box of fine cigars. I sighted a herd near Penguin’s Creek, Text. From clocks to calendars, the concept of time has inspired countless jokes and puns that tickle our funny bone. GIPHY is the platform that animates your world. Joke: Once there was a young boy, around 8 years old, who lived in a village at the bottom of a hill. Looking for a good laugh? We’ve got you covered with over 105 hilariously funny long jokes that will keep you entertained for hours. The Englishman sweetly asks his wife, “Pass the honey, honey. “You can't cut me down,” the tree complains. By Laughlore Team Updated on October 25, 2023. These car jokes are sure to have your gears grinding and your wipers wiping away the tears from laughter. He spied the straw house and smelled Pork Chop inside and began to think to himself that Pork Chop would make a mighty fine meal, so Scott went and knocked on the door. Jun 26, 2023 · Ladies and gentlemen start your engines and get ready to laugh with these hysterical car jokes. Barton, you made it to 85, but I’m afraid I have bad news. Day 90: The bird said hello. What do you call a slow skier? – A SLOPEpoke! What can you catch in the winter with your eyes closed? – A Cold. Remember, age is just a number, and as you step into your 30s, the most important thing is to keep smiling and enjoying life. Best Long Jokes: A man walks into a bar and sees a sign that says, “Free drinks if you can make our horse laugh. Dec 7, 2023 · Nothing saves a lesson like a hilarious joke. There are sooo many bar jokes around today that listing them all on one page would be a near-impossible feat. After 30 years, mailman George decides to retire. Unfortunately, after just a few years, they are in Long Joke #3128. Read jokes about second chance that are good jokes for kids and friends. The man accepts the bet and orders a gin. One day, a little boy and a little girl are fighting about the differences between the sexes, and which one is better. So sit back, relax, and get ready to laugh your heart out! A big list of 10 second jokes, submitted and ranked by users. ’. 90 Second Jokes. By 30, you're expected to have a house, two children and to have seen the Taj Mahal. If your palm itches, it usually means you’ll come across some extra money, so you might be a rich fucker. 41. We've even broken things down by category so that you know which jokes will land best among your audience. No industry This joke may contain profanity. (Original) If your palm, your ear and your balls itch…. An Englishman, a Scot, and an Irishman walk into a pub with their wives and all order tea. Get ready to dive into a collection of lightning-fast jokes all centered around the theme of “30 Seconds Long. The other goes to a family in Spain; they name him “Juan. Scott said, “Little Pig! Little Pig! Let me in!”. My dad always said, “Life is like a dick joke; sometimes, it’s hard to swallow!”. Explore GIFs. A big list of 90 second jokes, submitted and ranked by users. It's always, like, optimistic. Before too long, a man happens by, sees the sign, and thinks it's a good deal. “How does it work?”. . He drinks it and flys out of the window, around the building and then back inside. Ranked By. The best school jokes for kids are simple and visual in nature, making them even more memorable. I would never say "Here comes that frog" in a horrifying manner. ” These quick quips will have you laughing in no time! Read More: Jokes About Pun Dog 30 Seconds Long Jokes Read More: Jan 20, 2024 · You’re so adorable, that didn’t hurt. #14 My boss is very easygoing. Because below, we've put together a long list of the funniest jokes the internet has to offer. Come back, let me show you how to punch. Dad jokes are timeless classics that have been passed down through generations, making dads famous for their sense of humor. Years later, Juan sends a picture of himself to his birth mother. Mar 4, 2024 · So while it’s more common for monologues to run closer to 60–90 seconds, the 30-second monologue provides a great opportunity to impress the people who make casting decisions. 1. 9K votes. Some 30 sec intros in this list are slightly longer or shorter than 30 seconds but can be easily edited to the exact 30 second length. After waiting a couple hours past the meeting time, they decide to follow the road back to the main base to see if he got lost. Subscribe to me here: https://www. Oct 22, 2023 · Really Good Long Jokes: The Desert Island Diary A man gets stranded on a desert island. I was going to tell a dick joke, but it’s too long. Here comes that frog. The answer is correct, so what am I? A: A clock. " — Akshat Anand. Like a good conversation starter or icebreaker go, a joke can keep up yours listeners’ brains the prepare them to receive your message. ***. Become instantly popular at work and when soc Introduction In the fast-paced world of humor, sometimes brevity is the soul of wit. This joke may contain profanity. A man walks into a bar, sits down at the counter and orders a beer in a glass and a beer in a thimble. Jun 28, 2013 · Bob Hansen attempts to break the world record for most jokes told in a minute (previously 20 jokes held by Australian comedian George Smiloveci) at the Creek & the Cave comedy club in Long Island A big list of how long jokes, submitted and ranked by users. On his last day, he makes his usual rounds. “It’s a talking clock. As they say, patience is a virtue, especially if you want to hear the punch line of a hilarious joke. We are swapping out our auto tool kits for Sep 8, 2023 · Skinny Irishman is a classic Irish joke: A skinny little Irishman goes into a lift, looks up and sees this HUGE black man standing next to him. Therefore, we’ve collected a bunch that we think are really funny. Everyone: vote up the funniest joke! Patience is a virtue, especially when you're waiting for the punchline of a good joke. But they will all make you laugh for much longer than 30 seconds. “I’m a talking An old ex-druggie is visiting his doctor. Jan 22, 2024 · What's the best way to spot a baby snake? Look for its rattle. Except for that one time when he found out avocado toast was back on the menu. (beat) No thank-yous – no yum-yums – not a peep, tho – Man is silent as the grave. May 1, 2023 · And they are paying for their own plane tickets. When I see food, I eat it. 20 second 90 30 second 10 second. ”. 30 seconds after I realize pieces of ice are hitting the car I get a text. MONOLOGUE Aug 1, 2023 · One-Liner Dick Jokes: My friend told me he has a tiny dick, and I said, “That’s no problem; size doesn’t matter… except when it comes to the ego!”. Long Jokes Are Good: “In an era when social media has amplified the expectation that jokes told in comedy clubs should be lean, short, and punchy, [Kyle Kinane’s] Dirt Nap shows what else is possible with the form. Updated August 6, 2019 1. On top of the hill was a temple where monks lived. Voting Rules. After 60 seconds swap fingers, if you can't smell or taste the difference, Isolate. Oct 22, 2021 · One is a necromancer and the other is a neck romancer. A wife complained to her husband that he could never locate her G spot. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wishes. Dad jokes, knock-knocks and corny one-liners galore. I once dated an optometrist, and she said Mar 30, 2016 · Dead from the root up and the balls are just for decoration. You put one finger in your mouth, and one up your ass. Inspired, the Scotsman turns to his wife saying, “Pass the sugar, sugar. Peter. The man tosses it back and says, Hey, that was pretty good. "You don't get in, either. "After all," I say, "we're only going to be celebrating it for half a minute. But 30 Rock Oct 6, 2023 · 160 Jokes For Teens That Make Them Laugh. Sometimes, a good joke needs a bit of setup to deliver the punchline that leaves you in stitches. From clever one-liners to hilarious anecdotes, these jokes are sure to tickle your funny bone. 0M views 19 items. Jun 23, 2020 · I've told her not to get her hopes up. Pull out these PG jokes anytime you need a wholesome laugh. Search. UPJOKE. Eumelus. I’m a congressman. One way we can relate and make our students laugh and feel comfortable is through funny jokes. Day 30: Feeling a bit lonely, saw a bird though. A fantastic mega collection of the best jokes that take 30 seconds to say. Dave, who was listening - didn't believe him, said, 'I bet $100 it doesn't'. Evan Lambert. A man is flying in a hot-air Zach's boss was super pissed as Zack was an hour late to the work because of the daylight savings time. Jul 21, 2022 · Do you know what is even less fun? Turning 30. His wife retorts, “Yes, and never in the good way. Jan 17, 2023 · Get ready to laugh, hard. The boy says to the man, "Yeah, well, I didn’t believe in reincarnation when I was your age either. Turning 30 is a fantastic and funny journey that we should all embrace with humor and laughter. But if farts were flattery, honey – he would be Shakespeare. You might be a redneck if you show up naked to a come as you are party. For social media A long black hearse followed by a second long black hearse about 50 feet behind. Due to the shortage of lateral flow tests available the government are going to introduce a new '1 minute self diagnostic' process. When looking for funny school jokes, these will really get the classroom going. — johnbugara. 136. Javier Brosch/Shutterstock. We would like to show you a description here but the site won’t allow us. “Your pancreas and kidneys are shot. The man replied: “You can’t do this. Here is a list of funny 30 seconds jokes and even better 30 seconds puns that will make you laugh with friends. The traditional multi-camera sitcom, based around a group of family or friends—in this sample, Friends and The Big Bang Theory —sits right in the middle in terms of The next day a wolf, Scott Howard, happened upon the pig brothers and their new homestead. No industry Nov 9, 2023 · Funny Winter Jokes for Kids. Like, ‘Hey, here comes that frog, all right. I'm fine, I was only on the second rung. I fell off a 30 foot ladder yesterday. Trust me, these jokes for teens are straight-up fire emojis. After the boss left, Zack kick a lamp to vent out his frustration. Aug 30, 2018 · His 2016 appearance on “Conan,” in which he plugged his book for 30 seconds and spent the next three and a half minutes doing Catskills-style jokes about how his wife was “a real battle-ax Feb 24, 2020 · A roundup of 21 of the best short jokes and one-liners by the late comedic genius Mitch Hedberg, whose stand-up continues to influence and resonate today as much as it did when he was alive. October 6, 2023 by micheletripple. When it is 9 a. Oh, and about 50 grand in your savings account. I survived the booze and the cocaine, I can take it. Get ready to laugh out loud with our collection of hilarious internet humor and jokes. Behind the second hearse was a solitary woman walking a pit bull on a leash. A few minutes later, he comes back in, and the horse is laughing so hard, tears are streaming down its face. I like my women like I like my coffee. youtube. The mice were cornered when one of the mice turned around and barked, "Ruff! Ruff! Ruff!" The surprised cat ran away scared. Why is a football stadium always cold? It has lots of fans! 32. com/channel/UC_G0 Watch more here: https://www. Find the GIFs, Clips, and Stickers that make your conversations more positive, more expressive, and more you. We can’t let this timeless tradition stop on our watch. " The third blonde said, "Well, I know what Easter is all about. Nov 28, 2014 · Curb Your Enthusiasm 3. 42. #13 ‘Business is up and down at the moment; I sell yo-yos. A woman has twins and gives them up for adoption. In the fast-paced world of humor, sometimes brevity is the soul of wit. The man thinks, “I can do that,” and goes outside. After a life of drinking and drugging, it’s taken a toll on his health. You know what they say, laughter is the best medicine, and what better way to laugh than with jokes. Fresh dough – the good sausages – thick – and Boy, he just ate ‘em up. 31. Apr 8, 2023 · Best Long Jokes. #12 I told my female colleague that she drew her eyebrows too high. Why Mar 10, 2021 · 6:30 is the best time on a clock. The walk for quite some time when the Asian man jumps out of the bushes and yells, "SUPPLIES. Some of the best "over 5 minute" jokes of all time. “Well, Mr. I'll have another. Apr 28, 2008 · Here is a funny joke! Two sisters, one blonde and one brunette, inherit the family ranch. Alcestis. A man sitting at the bar says, 'The gin sold here gives you thirty seconds of flight'. Washington says "excuse me sir, I'm sorry to bother you. A kid sets up a lemonade stand in front of his house, with a sign that says, All you can drink for a dime. 4. Share a laugh with a friend! Hey, hey, you’ve come to the right place if you’re a teen vibing in the world of TikTok dances, meme culture, and the ever-annoying “Why won’t my Wi-Fi just WORK?” moments. My dad just gave a trifecta of dad jokes all within 30 seconds, and then left my room. Behind her were 200 women walking single file. Every now and then, you will encounter a person who will make you wait a good amount of time before they deliver the punch line. Apparently, the snowmen want more sugar than corn flakes can provide. In this collection of time-related jokes, we explore the humorous The second blonde said, "Easter is the holiday that we celebrate Jesus' being born of the virgin and give gifts to each other. IE 11 is not supported. Related Categories. “What’s that gong for?” the friend asks him. Dec 9, 2015 · Mark Christopher Lee got the joke, and took it very seriously indeed. Feb 23, 2024 · Stock up on these dad jokes, corny puns and funny knock-knock jokes to use the next time you need a good laugh. Explore Great 30-Second Monologues for Kids. All 30 sec music cues are provided with commercial royalty free license. Nov 17, 2023 · I never knew my real ladder. The bus driver says: “Ugh, that’s the ugliest baby I’ve ever seen!”. After much arguing to and fro, the boy drops his pants and says, “Here’s something I have that you’ll never have. December 2, 2023 / Life Skills, Parenting. “Tell it to me straight doc. Day 10: Made a hat out of leaves. Dec 14, 2020 · Check out these fun-filled long jokes that promise hearty chuckles without any of the blushes. 30 Seconds Joke: It is amazing how politicians can fit all the joke is just one of many funny jokes on Joke Buddha! Apr 4, 2013 · 17 Videos Under 30 Seconds Guaranteed To Make You Laugh. ao la cs ow tc iy ds hv xr rw